Fuck art _|_ !
I slept halfway through and i have not enough time eventhough i had 3 hours to finish it. I think im focusing gila babi on geog and maths pp2 this friday.Grr, im going out in how many minutes,accompany farihin for her hair treatment. Idk to go for one anot, so yeah.

Selamat hari raya kepada umat umat islam.
And sumpah rambut jaja macam mangkuk kat almari dapur aku sia.

Im sorry,but i cant simply lie to myself and im tired of smiling over a lie after all this while. Im having a hard time to move on without you. "Come on,move on. Just take me as some random guy you've date or just take me like the guys you love and then you moved on so quickly." Saying it is as simple as abc,you're not im my place,you dont know how it feels like. Wherever i go, i kept thinking of you. The moments we had together, the sweet things you did to me. Ive told you, ive never felt that way before. You told me i did make you felt special and im different,but why did you left? Faded feelings. Isnt that unreasonable enough? "I dont care if you wanna call me a jerk or what,but i hafta be truthful." I dont even have the heart to call you a jerk,cause i still am not over you. Be surprise,yes.

Your haters,my friends, ask me to move on, saying i could find someone better,someone more sweet cause i kept telling them you're the sweetest thing that has ever happen to me. They kept insisting,without asking me how much i loved you. They didnt understand. I treasured the one month we've dated,and i promise i'll never forget the times we shared. The moments when your 2 bestfriends are busy with work,and you had no other friends beside them, i was the one who accompanied you,all along. I was so delighted to be by your side,sitting beside you for hours like there's no tomorrow. The late night talks we had till 5, the webcamming sessions we had,laughing and crapping with each other for the whole night. I just realise, the more longer im with you, the lesser we had of them,late night talks and webcamming sessions. You tried telling me you miss those late night talks,you miss talking to me,but i was too busy to even realise all those stuffs.

Till, you told me you had to let me go, you had fade feelings after i told you to be honest about either you still love me like how you do,but yes,thats the truth i had to face. It happens too fast for me,when i think its only the beginning. Remember i told you , you were one step to what i want everything in a guy? Yes,i do mean it,thats why im this hard to move on. Its not that im waiting for you,but i just cant develop feelings for anyone else,for the mean time. Say imma stuck with my past or what,im just being frank here. As im very tired of hiding the truth and playing pretence all this while. Really,im not waiting for you, but it will be a big woah if you still like me or either i can have another chance to know you better,like how we did last month. But nope,i just dont think that will happen. Its a miracle then if that happens but yes,as i know,you're already moving on and liking someone else when you say you dont wanna fall for someone else bfr that. Whatever. Ive been keeping this to my wholeself and finally i have the courage to let it out. Im sure you didnt read my blog,cause you're busy with stuffs whc somehow i dont wanna know. Im done with my blabberings. And yes,to others,this is my blog,and its my say. If you're not satisfied somehow,with what ive written,approached me and talk nicely. Don't be a coward,blogging back about 'a whore is not over a flirt.' or whatever. Done.

This picture was taken today,at my house. Well, pardon our messy hair, we were revising maths while lying down. So yeah,currently fucked up. First,mensus came during science paper and yeah fuck it, adding up with tmrw,3 days didnt fast in total,i wanna do full sia -.-'! Every paper was difficult and i dont know why. When i studies hard yesterday till sahur,bah. K whatever. Im not depending on science. Maths was such a screwed up paper,ive got no comment about it. Maths is always a screwed up subject btw,other than science. So yeah,went to causeway to farihin to accompany her. I was having stomach pain,i swear it hurts and i feel like shouting. Stomach pain as in stomach cramps. I feel like going on a jog to reduce the pain but im plain lazy and i had art to do. K wtv,im done. Im sorry farihin,if i didnt entertained you alot just now,cause i was busy entertaining this pain like shit sia -.-

Bye arseholes.

Labels: where're you now?, You were there when i fall

First of all, happy 16 birthday to this baby of mine, Nur Farihin Binte Kamal. Yes,full name,ada hal? Lol. So yeap,my baby's turned 16 today and eventhough im this tired to blog,i'll still on the comp and blog about this birthday babies. Okay,let's watch NC16 and farihin,you dont have to sulk and say "Diam ah." when we teased you about watching Nc16 movies,lol. And yeas,im sorry but i had to give the advanced birthday present to you cause you really wanted that jonas brother's album so much. So if i didnt buy on that monday, you'll buy yourself. So yeap,thats your advanced birthday present. I swear im happy to see you hyper that way calling me when i didnt attend school when you get that album already and shouting "Mayaaaaaaaa! Thanks ahhhh aku sayang kau!" K isit? I dont quite remember cause it was last week. But really,you made me smiled eventhough i was sleeping before you called me. ;D

Soo yeah,im really sorry we couldnt make your birthday a special one,like how you and the others planned up my birthday party. And yeah,please remember me when you're listening to that album,thanks hehe. Thanks for being there,thanks for the accompanion as always,thanks for the calls when im bored,thanks for the cheer up jokes when im down,thanks for the kisses you gave me,thanks for the singings video you sang for me when i asked you to. And lastly,thanks for the 1 year plus,almost to two, precious friendship you gave me,i really loved you. I really hope we could contact each other. Though im really sure im out of evergreen secondary by this this end of year. Cause i really lack of revisions for my n's,im so sorry if i dissapoint you. But yeah,i really wanna be out of that school. Period.

Such a bad luck your birthday falls on an n's level day. 3 papers zomg,i bet you revise like crazy. And my wish from me to you,is for you to go for sec 5s,so yeap. I can even write up 5 long paragraphs describing about you,and i maybe,i can end up crying typing out how we started our friendship. Where out first picture taken is,whc is at class,thats where we started getting close. And im really touched you remember all that too. So yeap,the quarrels we had,the tiny weeny fights lame ones i mean, made me knows how you'll react and how you want be to stay as one of your friends. I really am thankful to have a bestfriend like you,and i hope this stays on. Have a great 16th celebration with your family. I love you ♥Okay yeap,another birthday girl it is. Happy 16th birthday to Fadiana too. K surprisingly,i had the urge to with you happy birthday too. Thanks to jaja/nabilah(hahaa) for planning this up. Texting me at first,asking if i wanna wish you happybirthday,so yeap. I just join in the plan,eventhough im revising like crazy. Was going to give up when jaja hang up my call when i called for the first time,but i really wanna wish you. But i didnt own your number,so yeah i called ja again. And i was happy she finally pick up my call. Called you and yeah shouted HAPPY BIRTHDAY FADIANA! And yeah, sang for you a birthday song,whc i think jaja sings it very slowwwwww and she get the lyrics wrong,case dh lama tak nyanyikan orang birthday song,lol.

So yeah i dont know if you really was close to crying but yeah im really happy you appreciated our friendship is built back again. Cause you did text me after we end our conference call. :) So yeah, you know you owe me a dRRRawing of dendeng at msn convo,im waiting for it. If real dendeng,also can,cause im hungry for dendeng,lol. But since you're broke then neverminddd. Haha joking :] I looooove people with pelat r or s, so yeah. You're in that cute category of people. Dont be disheartened about your ex,whc you told me about. Get it once and over with, so yeah. Guys are not worth our tears jia you! Aku bobal macam paham padahal -.- Eh siak ah. K stop. Goodluck for your o levels. And yes, i really hope 1234 could go back as per normal,without any conflicts happen. Or maybe,i want a time machine,where we were sooo happy with each other.Having out late night calls. Its great to have a girl's late night call than rather having a guy's one everydayyyy. Lol. Good luck in life and have fun on your birthday okay ♥

And to ja: We're the super cute voice ah right? Lol, i didnt know i planned like a kid's voice saying "Okay nanti fad dh angkat abeh kan die dh cakap hello,abeh kau kene cakap 123 taaaau! Kalau tak,aku tak tau bile nak start. And then nanti kite kene pekik sama sama! " Lol. I didnt even give the time for you to talk lol. So yes,thanks to ja for everything. Really.

Thanks for planning this up,whc made me remind of the past,where me tasha fad and you had our fun late night calls. Thanks for understanding me,thanks for knowing me,thanks for asking me to stop pretending and thanks for everything. Meet up soon okay!

Current time: 7.20am

Are relationships worth it? This question at bulletins make me wanna update about this. Random topic,i kno. But yeah, this are my thoughts towards relationships.

Relationship can be worth it sometimes,if both parties knows how to appreciate each other. Sweet sacrifices each other made, the feelings of affection towards each other made both parties wanna stay through out with each other. Make out with each other is only part of it. Relationship isnt about kissing and hugging,but as both parties love each other,they tend to do all those and some,may overdo with it. Well,but long relationships do sucks as well. Faded feelings will happen, and truth will be out and yeah normal stuffs.

After break up, understand understood. Blog about each other mistake's. And some even,insults each other, not knowing they have loved each other once, why insults? I dont really understand why. You have ever kissed that person,have ever said ily to that guy/girl, for tremendous times,depending on how long you're with that guy/girl, and why insult all after the breakup?

Being single.
Some say its boring and some hints on saying " life's bored without love." Yeah,its bored but since some cant be bothered to find someone new, they tend to stay single and keeping those feelings on looking at their friends who have partners and keeps on envying. Being single, you'll have alot of freedom,but boredom sucks. Some stay single cause they can't move on,because of the past,because of someone. Because they're waiting for someone and cases like that.

Sooo,sometimes,i dont understand why there is a need to be in a relationship if breakups will happen. Faded feelings, jealousy and everything happens.

No hearbreaking moments,no love. Remember this.
Out,im out of point.

Labels: No love no life.

Since Mimi ask me to update a para for him,then these's one fr you baby.
HAHAHAH -.-

Estimated,he said we've known each other for 10months. Im not that sure. But what i know,ive known him quite long. But our first meet is only this year,during my surprise birthday party. Thanks bestfriend(haha) for the cake you bought. Appreciated much. And surprisingly,that cake its the most chocolatey cake ive ever taste. I mean,its nice than other cakes. Im sure gonna buy the cake again one day. :D So yeap,he do give random calls. As in, he'll suddenly appear and "Mimi's" name will appear at my screenphone one day suddenly. I didnt expect actually. Haha and he'll go "Kan aku dah cakap aku tak lupe kawan macam mane kau cakap aku lupa kau." Haha WHAT THEEEEE. K stop. But yeah,i miss him though. Cause we've only met one time. He ask me to go tamp if i miss him -.- Siapa mau gi layan sia. Haha. And yeah, he crap alot,like aloooot. About mantat all keluar sia-.- I just ikotkan, nak layankan nye pasal. Lol. Okay yeah,thats it for today's update. Ive got nothing to update on. So yeap. Mimi,satisfied? Haha. Okay go,meet up soon. Tanak suda.

Labels: Prelims aint a thing, right?

School was fine,i slept alot of times in class. Thanks to first,haiqal and second,norman for texting me and making me stay awake. So yup after school went back home. Actually,i was dissapointed about my geog marks,i got 18/50 when i did revise. But im happy i pass my maths. Got 59/80 for paper 1,and 21/60 for paper 2. So yup,percentage over 100 percent is 57/58 percent i think lol. Ergh,whatever to studies. Bought bubble tea for ajie,buat muke mangkok whereas i puasa sia. Then went home and slept till 5. Tasha calls me up and i bath and get ready to go out with her. Met,went to the lib slack for 20minutes then went to macdonalds to breakfast since tasha's craving for mac. She bought mcchicken and i brought mcspicy. Then,went to meet her dad, they wanted to buy paint so yeah,i acc.

Bought bubble tea. Walked to fushan and sit around that area. Thought of going fushan's above part,but alot of mat reps. Fuck mat reps. I miss that place. Talked and tasha couldnt stand her stomach ache, but i can. Cause i think the cause of the stomach ache is the oreo crush. Lol,then we went home. Farihin acc me by talking to me all the way till i reached home. Onlined,and ask farihin to print some art things for me.

Thanks alot,insyirah and haiqal. For whatever you know i know public dont know,lol.
I dont know if i could make it through these kindaf things. Im tired,im irritated and im sleepy.
Bye.

Labels: Fuck you., you and your lies.

Time check:3.22am.
School was sucha drag. I drag myself out of bed. Well i thought of skipping school again,but nevermind. Ain's alone and tasha confirm not coming. So yup,sacrifice,im sweet i kno. I was being kind when im otw to school. Sabrina(sec one) was heeding to the bustop quickly cause its drizzling. I bought my umbrella along but i only hold it,cause i was lazy to open it,and whats in my mind is only,reach school fast cause its late already. Approached sabrina and off to share my umbrella,so yup went to school with her.

Art lesson was gerek. Hamzah,izrul,fadzly and jo talking crap for two whole periods. So yeah,maths was sleepy like fuck,and recess buat kecoh dalam class. That pic above was during recess. I feel like i havent talk to nabeelah(center) for a long time,so i approached her. I miss her and the old moments though. So yeah,blablabla till school finishes. Walked home with ain and faris. Ain and me went to shengshong with uniform sia, then brought the things needed and she accompany me do chocolate cornflakes. Mom was at home,and she helped do cheese biscuits too. Finish everything,went to shopandsave to buy icecream and more cornflakes and send ain to the bustop. Thanks ain for everything (:

Went back home,was suppose to continue doing cheese biscuits,but i slept instead till buka. I quarrelled with mom alot of time today,really. We're like shouting at each other for small reasons. But whatever,im use to it. Slept back after buka,cause i was effing sleepy. Then get to know,ajie came. Always making sudden surprise if he's coming to my house sia-.-Woke up at 9,and do chocolate cornflakes and honey cornflakes again,and cheese biscuits. Its alot,and i did it till 2.45am, 6 hours,can get pay siah if working-.- Tiiiil, 3am,i shooh ajie from the comp,and my turn (:

Jaja,please dont this to yourself. Ykno you can do it,anyth just stand up strong and please,treasure the loved ones you had before anyth happens. I regretted not treasuring my loved ones. And i just realise how much i need my stepdad once he's gone. Mom and me reminded ourselves about stepdad cause when we're doing kuihs,she suddenly say "This year dah no one kacau2 take your kuih anymore. Selalu,cik salim curi2 amek kuih lepas dah bake kan? Abeh adik marah marah,ingat?" Of course i remember. How could i forget? I miss stepdad:/ Bye.

Labels: I miss mimi. :D

I got loooong hand tentacles,like an octopus one. K whatever. I overslept for school today. Mom wakes me up before leaving home for work at 7.30 but i slept, not knowing i didnt set any alarm. Woke up,look at the time,9.30. I was like, OKAY WTFFFFFF. Seriously. I called mom,she say my form teacher called,i think. And she scolded me, boohoo? K,i dont really care. I dont intend to:/ Tasha also dint come, due to fall inside the toilet, careless gila babi. Only ain go,between us. So yup,im so sorry. Im gonna face the music tmr. Slept while waiting for ain to finish school. Get ready and stuffs,met ain and went to causeway and brought ingredients for honey cornflakes, ain wants my help to do those cornflakes. Since im bored at home, i just okay go.

Reach ain house,thought wanna do my chocolate cornflakes but yeah, there's no tulip chocolate sell at causeway's cold storage. Next time then. Done the cornflakescamwhored,then went to banquet to buy our breakfast food. I breakfast alone at home,since mom goes geylang to pay bills or what i dont know. Planned with haiqal to breakfast together,but yeah nevermind. I pitied him since he's staying so far. My choice at that time was either i breakfast alone at home,with haiqal,or with ef and mimi. Cause ef ask if i wanna tag along with em,but neh uh,cityhall siol,siapa mau gi layan.

So yup, bumped into ain's dad at int then ain alighted the bus and i reach home prepare for buka,and buka-ed. I ate tomyam banmian. I cant finish it,its damn alot. Whoever finish it,i'll salute it! And i had oreo milkshake. (Y) And yup,ive brought farihin an advanced birthday present. A jonas brother album,really hope you like it,eventhough there's no surprise or buka luar with birthday girl on the 29th or whatever. I still love you. Dont worry about where i get the money from babe,its not as if i stole the money from bank,lol. I just hope you like it,happy 16th in advanced. :D

What's up with outgoing girls? Doesnt mean they are outgoing,they can flirt around that way. Im sorry if these ouch you but im stating the fact. It really piss me off,looking at flirts, which dont have lifes. Yeah none of my business but please,fucking get out of my face,cause girls like you disgusts me. Doesnt mean you're an outgoing character,you have to act like a bitch with your guy friends,like everyone of them.

Im referring to someone random. Get your facts right before assuming this post is about you.
And yes whats with girls being proud to have big boobies? Lol, whats there to be proud of? So alot of guys could be attracted to you? Zomg,that guy wont love you for who you are. I dont understand why girls are proud to have big boobies, eiwl. Im like,ouhouhkay,im proud for what i am now,i wont ask for more. Girls with big boobies have a hard time running and jogging. Thank god mine's not like that. I love to jog and i feel like jogging tonight if im free. I know this post is fucking random but who cares,its my blog and i can update whenever i like.

Im out,waiting for farihin to finish school.

I can't wait for raya,cause i wanna go out with lovelies and close friends to alot and alot of houses.
Not because of money,but yeah because of kuih and foodsxzxz.Make sure i eat till i get bloated. But i havent done spring cleaning yet, my living room is still in a mess.My bedroom? ASSSSSSSSSSS USUAL. Messier than before. Tasha,come my house do spring cleaning for me can? Cakap je isteri tercontoh,haha.Yeah,since stepdad's alrd not with us, me and mom have a hard time preparing things for raya since mom confirm will get tired if she's back from work.

Okay,i skipped school on monday(yesterday) whc also my girls skipped too. And yeah met ariff at 6.30pm,and booked a table at macd and wait for him to come. Yeah we slacked,and he said he regret slacking with me,cause he maki-ed alot. "Should have come exact on buka and left you waiting here." Lol.Talking to ariff, will give you a heartache,confirm 100percent. But he made me laughed all the way when im eating by doing stupid reactions.And plus,making me embarrased by saying hi,approaching strangers and shouting like whaaaaaaaaaat. +_+ Heed to lib,thanks ariff for paying my library fine of 15cents using your posb card,lol. -.-Try finding books but there's none. So yeah he accompany me awhile at bns to wait for nabilah.Since he gotta go,to meet his cous. So yeap,i pitied him and ask him to go,without waiting for nabilah.

Nabilah reached and we walk around causeway. Slack as usual,fun times with her. <3Thanks alot for today nabilah. And ariff too. I cant wait for tmrw,cause i miss my girls much.
*chanting. Tmr school starts at 8.20 not 7.20.Lol,cause i'll always forget and went for school as usual. Im out.

Do i have a crush? Its for you to find out yourself. :)

Labels: Im happy just to let you walk away.

Random post,since im bored. Doing of honey cornflakes will be 15 minutes later,im lazy to start now. I'll be doing the kuihs myself,since mom's tired. So im doing everything alone,sedih or what? And yeah,reason for skipping school is of course,im lazy. And i thought ariff wanna heed to the lib in the morning,but i slept all the way. Lol, then delayed time till 4 plus. So yup.

This are the features of what my future boyfriend will be, or err dream boyf? Lol.
1.Tarings please, or either unique teeth. (Im weird,i know.)
2.Height 165-170+cm.
3.Tanned,like me.
4.Dressings like joe jonas! I dont like slack, lol. *optional.
5.Gentle man?
6.Understands well.
7.Knows a girl's wants.
8.Meant his sweet words.
9.Who would made me comfortable around him.
10.Havent had his first kiss,cause i havent had mine. *optional.
11.Knows how to play guitar and sings for me.
12.Who could make me forget everything but the hands im holding.
13.Who would make me feel comfortable looking into his eyes.

Okay done,thats it. :D
Afiq,if you're reading this. Haha,sorry i havent made the "menantu" list yet,lol.

Okay,thats the only pictures for today. Look at my eyebags whc look like pau barbeque ayam,grrrh. Ive slept enough. Yeah,i think im born naturally with eyebags,nevermind. Woke up at 1.30pm,went to woodlands lama and gave my n81 box to the shop i brought the handphone from,then buy kuih things,alone. Since my friends are not even free to accompany me for a fucking 20minutes. Sedih or huwhat sia -.-! Then bumped into syafiq at bustop but i didnt approached him since i got swollen eyes. Reached home,played comp,do housechores,then get ready.

Met ayah and ajie at amk last cab at 5pm. As usual,i was early lol. Then heed to bugis st,but nothing caught my eyes so ajie plan on to buy the same watch. Since my watch that tasha brought it for me at jb was broken since 2 months ago. D: I brought black,and ajie brought red. And now i have two same things with him;robot necklace and watch (: So yeah,brought crumpler bag(i know its common) but yeah,i want at least a small bag. Heed to mustafa to buy some baby stuffs for kakyayang and heed to penin,and this was last minute cause ayah insist on me at least buy one tee. And i brought it at penin. Thank god there's this shop whc seel good stuffs still open sia (Y)

Ive got no story but i feel like updating. Doing of kuih raya delayed to tmr,cause me and mom forget to buy the small cups to put the cornflakes. Am currently chatting with farihin and nabilah,and im gg to off soon,very soon. Im tired,and i hafta go shopping with ajie and dad tmrw. Maybe will be heeding to bugis. Okay,bismillah for tmrw,im scared of akward situations. :/

So yeah,went to woodlands lama. And did surveys of handphone,didnt plan on changing handphone cause there also quite expensive. But i asked this first shop i surveyed with mom,how much he'll take my n81,he said 180-.- I brought if for 400 plus kiwaaak. He say look at the condition all. Second shop,took my n81 for 300bucks,freaking good,then i look around for new handphone. I want the flip walkman sia,very cute,small gile,then 600 plus -.- I wanted cybershot,got this handphone but 500 plus.

Then was attracted to this sony erricson hp.its 488 at first, but we didnt know havent plus gst. But when the guy transferring my pictures and songs in my n81,he plus the gst all around 500 plus siao -.- And its W760I. K btw thanks mom. Im off,bye. Let's finish off my update,read the lyrics. D:

Labels: Stucked.

I dint went to school today,as in yesterday, since its already almost 3am. Well,my girls too cause everyone was tired. And guess what! I got 59/80 for maths,for maths paper 1 prelims. K why am i excited? Cause i didnt pass my maths dah lama sia! I off the comp at 4 ytd. As usual,crapped with efenddy. K,sex is the hottest topic,and ive found something really shocking,for me, about him. Then talk about virginity first priority and shites,and he told me im naive,wth right? K then i sahur-ed and then i slept till 3pm. (Y) Woke up,played the comp then mandi and siap,meet mum then go little india to go kk hosp. Meet ajie,then buka. Then go hosp go visit my makcik,she just gave birth,kak sdare i mean. Her baby name is Seri Syariezaty Nur Aqilah, can make up two names sia,really. Vrrrrry cute,plus she kentot very kuat! Lols,then go back buy things at cold storage and home-ed.

Since long i didnt webby with afiq(fiqsion),cause he didnt have webby-.- And he used afiq(hamster) lappy,cause he go ns camp. Brrrh,eh aku miss hamster's crap. Cepat pulang tonek :D ROFLOL. Okay,i crap with this afiq for hours,serious shite. We're gay partners for now. Lol,read the convo to know the story. Kalau malas,tkpe. K go, im tired and cuaca bahang and im sleepy,im hungry and saya dahaga. Im off around 15 minutes later,after finish chatting with this fucktart efenddy and asshole faris. K bye :D

Fuck art _|_ !
I slept halfway through and i have not enough time eventhough i had 3 hours to finish it. I think im focusing gila babi on geog and maths pp2 this friday.Grr, im going out in how many minutes,accompany farihin for her hair treatment. Idk to go for one anot, so yeah.

Selamat hari raya kepada umat umat islam.
And sumpah rambut jaja macam mangkuk kat almari dapur aku sia.

Im sorry,but i cant simply lie to myself and im tired of smiling over a lie after all this while. Im having a hard time to move on without you. "Come on,move on. Just take me as some random guy you've date or just take me like the guys you love and then you moved on so quickly." Saying it is as simple as abc,you're not im my place,you dont know how it feels like. Wherever i go, i kept thinking of you. The moments we had together, the sweet things you did to me. Ive told you, ive never felt that way before. You told me i did make you felt special and im different,but why did you left? Faded feelings. Isnt that unreasonable enough? "I dont care if you wanna call me a jerk or what,but i hafta be truthful." I dont even have the heart to call you a jerk,cause i still am not over you. Be surprise,yes.

Your haters,my friends, ask me to move on, saying i could find someone better,someone more sweet cause i kept telling them you're the sweetest thing that has ever happen to me. They kept insisting,without asking me how much i loved you. They didnt understand. I treasured the one month we've dated,and i promise i'll never forget the times we shared. The moments when your 2 bestfriends are busy with work,and you had no other friends beside them, i was the one who accompanied you,all along. I was so delighted to be by your side,sitting beside you for hours like there's no tomorrow. The late night talks we had till 5, the webcamming sessions we had,laughing and crapping with each other for the whole night. I just realise, the more longer im with you, the lesser we had of them,late night talks and webcamming sessions. You tried telling me you miss those late night talks,you miss talking to me,but i was too busy to even realise all those stuffs.

Till, you told me you had to let me go, you had fade feelings after i told you to be honest about either you still love me like how you do,but yes,thats the truth i had to face. It happens too fast for me,when i think its only the beginning. Remember i told you , you were one step to what i want everything in a guy? Yes,i do mean it,thats why im this hard to move on. Its not that im waiting for you,but i just cant develop feelings for anyone else,for the mean time. Say imma stuck with my past or what,im just being frank here. As im very tired of hiding the truth and playing pretence all this while. Really,im not waiting for you, but it will be a big woah if you still like me or either i can have another chance to know you better,like how we did last month. But nope,i just dont think that will happen. Its a miracle then if that happens but yes,as i know,you're already moving on and liking someone else when you say you dont wanna fall for someone else bfr that. Whatever. Ive been keeping this to my wholeself and finally i have the courage to let it out. Im sure you didnt read my blog,cause you're busy with stuffs whc somehow i dont wanna know. Im done with my blabberings. And yes,to others,this is my blog,and its my say. If you're not satisfied somehow,with what ive written,approached me and talk nicely. Don't be a coward,blogging back about 'a whore is not over a flirt.' or whatever. Done.

This picture was taken today,at my house. Well, pardon our messy hair, we were revising maths while lying down. So yeah,currently fucked up. First,mensus came during science paper and yeah fuck it, adding up with tmrw,3 days didnt fast in total,i wanna do full sia -.-'! Every paper was difficult and i dont know why. When i studies hard yesterday till sahur,bah. K whatever. Im not depending on science. Maths was such a screwed up paper,ive got no comment about it. Maths is always a screwed up subject btw,other than science. So yeah,went to causeway to farihin to accompany her. I was having stomach pain,i swear it hurts and i feel like shouting. Stomach pain as in stomach cramps. I feel like going on a jog to reduce the pain but im plain lazy and i had art to do. K wtv,im done. Im sorry farihin,if i didnt entertained you alot just now,cause i was busy entertaining this pain like shit sia -.-

Bye arseholes.

Labels: where're you now?, You were there when i fall

First of all, happy 16 birthday to this baby of mine, Nur Farihin Binte Kamal. Yes,full name,ada hal? Lol. So yeap,my baby's turned 16 today and eventhough im this tired to blog,i'll still on the comp and blog about this birthday babies. Okay,let's watch NC16 and farihin,you dont have to sulk and say "Diam ah." when we teased you about watching Nc16 movies,lol. And yeas,im sorry but i had to give the advanced birthday present to you cause you really wanted that jonas brother's album so much. So if i didnt buy on that monday, you'll buy yourself. So yeap,thats your advanced birthday present. I swear im happy to see you hyper that way calling me when i didnt attend school when you get that album already and shouting "Mayaaaaaaaa! Thanks ahhhh aku sayang kau!" K isit? I dont quite remember cause it was last week. But really,you made me smiled eventhough i was sleeping before you called me. ;D

Soo yeah,im really sorry we couldnt make your birthday a special one,like how you and the others planned up my birthday party. And yeah,please remember me when you're listening to that album,thanks hehe. Thanks for being there,thanks for the accompanion as always,thanks for the calls when im bored,thanks for the cheer up jokes when im down,thanks for the kisses you gave me,thanks for the singings video you sang for me when i asked you to. And lastly,thanks for the 1 year plus,almost to two, precious friendship you gave me,i really loved you. I really hope we could contact each other. Though im really sure im out of evergreen secondary by this this end of year. Cause i really lack of revisions for my n's,im so sorry if i dissapoint you. But yeah,i really wanna be out of that school. Period.

Such a bad luck your birthday falls on an n's level day. 3 papers zomg,i bet you revise like crazy. And my wish from me to you,is for you to go for sec 5s,so yeap. I can even write up 5 long paragraphs describing about you,and i maybe,i can end up crying typing out how we started our friendship. Where out first picture taken is,whc is at class,thats where we started getting close. And im really touched you remember all that too. So yeap,the quarrels we had,the tiny weeny fights lame ones i mean, made me knows how you'll react and how you want be to stay as one of your friends. I really am thankful to have a bestfriend like you,and i hope this stays on. Have a great 16th celebration with your family. I love you ♥Okay yeap,another birthday girl it is. Happy 16th birthday to Fadiana too. K surprisingly,i had the urge to with you happy birthday too. Thanks to jaja/nabilah(hahaa) for planning this up. Texting me at first,asking if i wanna wish you happybirthday,so yeap. I just join in the plan,eventhough im revising like crazy. Was going to give up when jaja hang up my call when i called for the first time,but i really wanna wish you. But i didnt own your number,so yeah i called ja again. And i was happy she finally pick up my call. Called you and yeah shouted HAPPY BIRTHDAY FADIANA! And yeah, sang for you a birthday song,whc i think jaja sings it very slowwwwww and she get the lyrics wrong,case dh lama tak nyanyikan orang birthday song,lol.

So yeah i dont know if you really was close to crying but yeah im really happy you appreciated our friendship is built back again. Cause you did text me after we end our conference call. :) So yeah, you know you owe me a dRRRawing of dendeng at msn convo,im waiting for it. If real dendeng,also can,cause im hungry for dendeng,lol. But since you're broke then neverminddd. Haha joking :] I looooove people with pelat r or s, so yeah. You're in that cute category of people. Dont be disheartened about your ex,whc you told me about. Get it once and over with, so yeah. Guys are not worth our tears jia you! Aku bobal macam paham padahal -.- Eh siak ah. K stop. Goodluck for your o levels. And yes, i really hope 1234 could go back as per normal,without any conflicts happen. Or maybe,i want a time machine,where we were sooo happy with each other.Having out late night calls. Its great to have a girl's late night call than rather having a guy's one everydayyyy. Lol. Good luck in life and have fun on your birthday okay ♥

And to ja: We're the super cute voice ah right? Lol, i didnt know i planned like a kid's voice saying "Okay nanti fad dh angkat abeh kan die dh cakap hello,abeh kau kene cakap 123 taaaau! Kalau tak,aku tak tau bile nak start. And then nanti kite kene pekik sama sama! " Lol. I didnt even give the time for you to talk lol. So yes,thanks to ja for everything. Really.

Thanks for planning this up,whc made me remind of the past,where me tasha fad and you had our fun late night calls. Thanks for understanding me,thanks for knowing me,thanks for asking me to stop pretending and thanks for everything. Meet up soon okay!

Current time: 7.20am

Are relationships worth it? This question at bulletins make me wanna update about this. Random topic,i kno. But yeah, this are my thoughts towards relationships.

Relationship can be worth it sometimes,if both parties knows how to appreciate each other. Sweet sacrifices each other made, the feelings of affection towards each other made both parties wanna stay through out with each other. Make out with each other is only part of it. Relationship isnt about kissing and hugging,but as both parties love each other,they tend to do all those and some,may overdo with it. Well,but long relationships do sucks as well. Faded feelings will happen, and truth will be out and yeah normal stuffs.

After break up, understand understood. Blog about each other mistake's. And some even,insults each other, not knowing they have loved each other once, why insults? I dont really understand why. You have ever kissed that person,have ever said ily to that guy/girl, for tremendous times,depending on how long you're with that guy/girl, and why insult all after the breakup?

Being single.
Some say its boring and some hints on saying " life's bored without love." Yeah,its bored but since some cant be bothered to find someone new, they tend to stay single and keeping those feelings on looking at their friends who have partners and keeps on envying. Being single, you'll have alot of freedom,but boredom sucks. Some stay single cause they can't move on,because of the past,because of someone. Because they're waiting for someone and cases like that.

Sooo,sometimes,i dont understand why there is a need to be in a relationship if breakups will happen. Faded feelings, jealousy and everything happens.

No hearbreaking moments,no love. Remember this.
Out,im out of point.

Labels: No love no life.

Since Mimi ask me to update a para for him,then these's one fr you baby.
HAHAHAH -.-

Estimated,he said we've known each other for 10months. Im not that sure. But what i know,ive known him quite long. But our first meet is only this year,during my surprise birthday party. Thanks bestfriend(haha) for the cake you bought. Appreciated much. And surprisingly,that cake its the most chocolatey cake ive ever taste. I mean,its nice than other cakes. Im sure gonna buy the cake again one day. :D So yeap,he do give random calls. As in, he'll suddenly appear and "Mimi's" name will appear at my screenphone one day suddenly. I didnt expect actually. Haha and he'll go "Kan aku dah cakap aku tak lupe kawan macam mane kau cakap aku lupa kau." Haha WHAT THEEEEE. K stop. But yeah,i miss him though. Cause we've only met one time. He ask me to go tamp if i miss him -.- Siapa mau gi layan sia. Haha. And yeah, he crap alot,like aloooot. About mantat all keluar sia-.- I just ikotkan, nak layankan nye pasal. Lol. Okay yeah,thats it for today's update. Ive got nothing to update on. So yeap. Mimi,satisfied? Haha. Okay go,meet up soon. Tanak suda.

Labels: Prelims aint a thing, right?

School was fine,i slept alot of times in class. Thanks to first,haiqal and second,norman for texting me and making me stay awake. So yup after school went back home. Actually,i was dissapointed about my geog marks,i got 18/50 when i did revise. But im happy i pass my maths. Got 59/80 for paper 1,and 21/60 for paper 2. So yup,percentage over 100 percent is 57/58 percent i think lol. Ergh,whatever to studies. Bought bubble tea for ajie,buat muke mangkok whereas i puasa sia. Then went home and slept till 5. Tasha calls me up and i bath and get ready to go out with her. Met,went to the lib slack for 20minutes then went to macdonalds to breakfast since tasha's craving for mac. She bought mcchicken and i brought mcspicy. Then,went to meet her dad, they wanted to buy paint so yeah,i acc.

Bought bubble tea. Walked to fushan and sit around that area. Thought of going fushan's above part,but alot of mat reps. Fuck mat reps. I miss that place. Talked and tasha couldnt stand her stomach ache, but i can. Cause i think the cause of the stomach ache is the oreo crush. Lol,then we went home. Farihin acc me by talking to me all the way till i reached home. Onlined,and ask farihin to print some art things for me.

Thanks alot,insyirah and haiqal. For whatever you know i know public dont know,lol.
I dont know if i could make it through these kindaf things. Im tired,im irritated and im sleepy.
Bye.

Labels: Fuck you., you and your lies.

Time check:3.22am.
School was sucha drag. I drag myself out of bed. Well i thought of skipping school again,but nevermind. Ain's alone and tasha confirm not coming. So yup,sacrifice,im sweet i kno. I was being kind when im otw to school. Sabrina(sec one) was heeding to the bustop quickly cause its drizzling. I bought my umbrella along but i only hold it,cause i was lazy to open it,and whats in my mind is only,reach school fast cause its late already. Approached sabrina and off to share my umbrella,so yup went to school with her.

Art lesson was gerek. Hamzah,izrul,fadzly and jo talking crap for two whole periods. So yeah,maths was sleepy like fuck,and recess buat kecoh dalam class. That pic above was during recess. I feel like i havent talk to nabeelah(center) for a long time,so i approached her. I miss her and the old moments though. So yeah,blablabla till school finishes. Walked home with ain and faris. Ain and me went to shengshong with uniform sia, then brought the things needed and she accompany me do chocolate cornflakes. Mom was at home,and she helped do cheese biscuits too. Finish everything,went to shopandsave to buy icecream and more cornflakes and send ain to the bustop. Thanks ain for everything (:

Went back home,was suppose to continue doing cheese biscuits,but i slept instead till buka. I quarrelled with mom alot of time today,really. We're like shouting at each other for small reasons. But whatever,im use to it. Slept back after buka,cause i was effing sleepy. Then get to know,ajie came. Always making sudden surprise if he's coming to my house sia-.-Woke up at 9,and do chocolate cornflakes and honey cornflakes again,and cheese biscuits. Its alot,and i did it till 2.45am, 6 hours,can get pay siah if working-.- Tiiiil, 3am,i shooh ajie from the comp,and my turn (:

Jaja,please dont this to yourself. Ykno you can do it,anyth just stand up strong and please,treasure the loved ones you had before anyth happens. I regretted not treasuring my loved ones. And i just realise how much i need my stepdad once he's gone. Mom and me reminded ourselves about stepdad cause when we're doing kuihs,she suddenly say "This year dah no one kacau2 take your kuih anymore. Selalu,cik salim curi2 amek kuih lepas dah bake kan? Abeh adik marah marah,ingat?" Of course i remember. How could i forget? I miss stepdad:/ Bye.

Labels: I miss mimi. :D

I got loooong hand tentacles,like an octopus one. K whatever. I overslept for school today. Mom wakes me up before leaving home for work at 7.30 but i slept, not knowing i didnt set any alarm. Woke up,look at the time,9.30. I was like, OKAY WTFFFFFF. Seriously. I called mom,she say my form teacher called,i think. And she scolded me, boohoo? K,i dont really care. I dont intend to:/ Tasha also dint come, due to fall inside the toilet, careless gila babi. Only ain go,between us. So yup,im so sorry. Im gonna face the music tmr. Slept while waiting for ain to finish school. Get ready and stuffs,met ain and went to causeway and brought ingredients for honey cornflakes, ain wants my help to do those cornflakes. Since im bored at home, i just okay go.

Reach ain house,thought wanna do my chocolate cornflakes but yeah, there's no tulip chocolate sell at causeway's cold storage. Next time then. Done the cornflakescamwhored,then went to banquet to buy our breakfast food. I breakfast alone at home,since mom goes geylang to pay bills or what i dont know. Planned with haiqal to breakfast together,but yeah nevermind. I pitied him since he's staying so far. My choice at that time was either i breakfast alone at home,with haiqal,or with ef and mimi. Cause ef ask if i wanna tag along with em,but neh uh,cityhall siol,siapa mau gi layan.

So yup, bumped into ain's dad at int then ain alighted the bus and i reach home prepare for buka,and buka-ed. I ate tomyam banmian. I cant finish it,its damn alot. Whoever finish it,i'll salute it! And i had oreo milkshake. (Y) And yup,ive brought farihin an advanced birthday present. A jonas brother album,really hope you like it,eventhough there's no surprise or buka luar with birthday girl on the 29th or whatever. I still love you. Dont worry about where i get the money from babe,its not as if i stole the money from bank,lol. I just hope you like it,happy 16th in advanced. :D

What's up with outgoing girls? Doesnt mean they are outgoing,they can flirt around that way. Im sorry if these ouch you but im stating the fact. It really piss me off,looking at flirts, which dont have lifes. Yeah none of my business but please,fucking get out of my face,cause girls like you disgusts me. Doesnt mean you're an outgoing character,you have to act like a bitch with your guy friends,like everyone of them.

Im referring to someone random. Get your facts right before assuming this post is about you.
And yes whats with girls being proud to have big boobies? Lol, whats there to be proud of? So alot of guys could be attracted to you? Zomg,that guy wont love you for who you are. I dont understand why girls are proud to have big boobies, eiwl. Im like,ouhouhkay,im proud for what i am now,i wont ask for more. Girls with big boobies have a hard time running and jogging. Thank god mine's not like that. I love to jog and i feel like jogging tonight if im free. I know this post is fucking random but who cares,its my blog and i can update whenever i like.

Im out,waiting for farihin to finish school.

I can't wait for raya,cause i wanna go out with lovelies and close friends to alot and alot of houses.
Not because of money,but yeah because of kuih and foodsxzxz.Make sure i eat till i get bloated. But i havent done spring cleaning yet, my living room is still in a mess.My bedroom? ASSSSSSSSSSS USUAL. Messier than before. Tasha,come my house do spring cleaning for me can? Cakap je isteri tercontoh,haha.Yeah,since stepdad's alrd not with us, me and mom have a hard time preparing things for raya since mom confirm will get tired if she's back from work.

Okay,i skipped school on monday(yesterday) whc also my girls skipped too. And yeah met ariff at 6.30pm,and booked a table at macd and wait for him to come. Yeah we slacked,and he said he regret slacking with me,cause he maki-ed alot. "Should have come exact on buka and left you waiting here." Lol.Talking to ariff, will give you a heartache,confirm 100percent. But he made me laughed all the way when im eating by doing stupid reactions.And plus,making me embarrased by saying hi,approaching strangers and shouting like whaaaaaaaaaat. +_+ Heed to lib,thanks ariff for paying my library fine of 15cents using your posb card,lol. -.-Try finding books but there's none. So yeah he accompany me awhile at bns to wait for nabilah.Since he gotta go,to meet his cous. So yeap,i pitied him and ask him to go,without waiting for nabilah.

Nabilah reached and we walk around causeway. Slack as usual,fun times with her. <3Thanks alot for today nabilah. And ariff too. I cant wait for tmrw,cause i miss my girls much.
*chanting. Tmr school starts at 8.20 not 7.20.Lol,cause i'll always forget and went for school as usual. Im out.

Do i have a crush? Its for you to find out yourself. :)

Labels: Im happy just to let you walk away.

Random post,since im bored. Doing of honey cornflakes will be 15 minutes later,im lazy to start now. I'll be doing the kuihs myself,since mom's tired. So im doing everything alone,sedih or what? And yeah,reason for skipping school is of course,im lazy. And i thought ariff wanna heed to the lib in the morning,but i slept all the way. Lol, then delayed time till 4 plus. So yup.

This are the features of what my future boyfriend will be, or err dream boyf? Lol.
1.Tarings please, or either unique teeth. (Im weird,i know.)
2.Height 165-170+cm.
3.Tanned,like me.
4.Dressings like joe jonas! I dont like slack, lol. *optional.
5.Gentle man?
6.Understands well.
7.Knows a girl's wants.
8.Meant his sweet words.
9.Who would made me comfortable around him.
10.Havent had his first kiss,cause i havent had mine. *optional.
11.Knows how to play guitar and sings for me.
12.Who could make me forget everything but the hands im holding.
13.Who would make me feel comfortable looking into his eyes.

Okay done,thats it. :D
Afiq,if you're reading this. Haha,sorry i havent made the "menantu" list yet,lol.

Okay,thats the only pictures for today. Look at my eyebags whc look like pau barbeque ayam,grrrh. Ive slept enough. Yeah,i think im born naturally with eyebags,nevermind. Woke up at 1.30pm,went to woodlands lama and gave my n81 box to the shop i brought the handphone from,then buy kuih things,alone. Since my friends are not even free to accompany me for a fucking 20minutes. Sedih or huwhat sia -.-! Then bumped into syafiq at bustop but i didnt approached him since i got swollen eyes. Reached home,played comp,do housechores,then get ready.

Met ayah and ajie at amk last cab at 5pm. As usual,i was early lol. Then heed to bugis st,but nothing caught my eyes so ajie plan on to buy the same watch. Since my watch that tasha brought it for me at jb was broken since 2 months ago. D: I brought black,and ajie brought red. And now i have two same things with him;robot necklace and watch (: So yeah,brought crumpler bag(i know its common) but yeah,i want at least a small bag. Heed to mustafa to buy some baby stuffs for kakyayang and heed to penin,and this was last minute cause ayah insist on me at least buy one tee. And i brought it at penin. Thank god there's this shop whc seel good stuffs still open sia (Y)

Ive got no story but i feel like updating. Doing of kuih raya delayed to tmr,cause me and mom forget to buy the small cups to put the cornflakes. Am currently chatting with farihin and nabilah,and im gg to off soon,very soon. Im tired,and i hafta go shopping with ajie and dad tmrw. Maybe will be heeding to bugis. Okay,bismillah for tmrw,im scared of akward situations. :/

So yeah,went to woodlands lama. And did surveys of handphone,didnt plan on changing handphone cause there also quite expensive. But i asked this first shop i surveyed with mom,how much he'll take my n81,he said 180-.- I brought if for 400 plus kiwaaak. He say look at the condition all. Second shop,took my n81 for 300bucks,freaking good,then i look around for new handphone. I want the flip walkman sia,very cute,small gile,then 600 plus -.- I wanted cybershot,got this handphone but 500 plus.

Then was attracted to this sony erricson hp.its 488 at first, but we didnt know havent plus gst. But when the guy transferring my pictures and songs in my n81,he plus the gst all around 500 plus siao -.- And its W760I. K btw thanks mom. Im off,bye. Let's finish off my update,read the lyrics. D:

Labels: Stucked.

I dint went to school today,as in yesterday, since its already almost 3am. Well,my girls too cause everyone was tired. And guess what! I got 59/80 for maths,for maths paper 1 prelims. K why am i excited? Cause i didnt pass my maths dah lama sia! I off the comp at 4 ytd. As usual,crapped with efenddy. K,sex is the hottest topic,and ive found something really shocking,for me, about him. Then talk about virginity first priority and shites,and he told me im naive,wth right? K then i sahur-ed and then i slept till 3pm. (Y) Woke up,played the comp then mandi and siap,meet mum then go little india to go kk hosp. Meet ajie,then buka. Then go hosp go visit my makcik,she just gave birth,kak sdare i mean. Her baby name is Seri Syariezaty Nur Aqilah, can make up two names sia,really. Vrrrrry cute,plus she kentot very kuat! Lols,then go back buy things at cold storage and home-ed.

Since long i didnt webby with afiq(fiqsion),cause he didnt have webby-.- And he used afiq(hamster) lappy,cause he go ns camp. Brrrh,eh aku miss hamster's crap. Cepat pulang tonek :D ROFLOL. Okay,i crap with this afiq for hours,serious shite. We're gay partners for now. Lol,read the convo to know the story. Kalau malas,tkpe. K go, im tired and cuaca bahang and im sleepy,im hungry and saya dahaga. Im off around 15 minutes later,after finish chatting with this fucktart efenddy and asshole faris. K bye :D

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Just call me Maya will do. I got eating disorder. My definition of eating disorder is,i cant grow any fatter,cause i eat and i shit all the time. Yes,believe me. Its difficult to grow,for me. I dont understand the existance of aneroxic. Aneroxic people,you dont look pretty with those sekeletons figures. We eat to live,and we live to eat. Think,it have a different meaning. Yes,i admit i envy girls than boys,cause i love girls more,k no. Joke -.- Cause i dont really like anything about myself? Yeah,that should explain a little. I dont understand why relationship happens,when things will end anyway. But i do agree that people goes into a rs,cause of affection,careness towards each other,and such. So yeah,i think this is already too long,but whatever. Thanks for reading up,and have a nice day.